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September 10, 2017

I should've said it while I can. I know I was being silly and we've talked about it for many times. But I just can't hold myself.
I've never been drowning in jealousy so maybe this is the feels.
Blinded.
But somehow I enjoy it.

I know its dumb or silly or maybe I'm just too afraid to lose you.

The more I think about it, the more I'm afraid to tell you.
Yeah its a coward act, but I never want to make our circumstances worse.
Being honest is right thing to do, but what if its wrong?
What if its just making everything go down?

you

I love it when it comes to you.
I love staring at you.
Watching you.
Watching you having fun with your game.

There's a lot to talk about,
to discuss.
But I'm running out of words.
I enjoy myself watching you,
too much enjoying.

Watching you, staring at you.
Looking at how much you've changed.

January 22, 2017

happy

he is so cuddly. i just know by the time he hug me hard. it was last december. my favorite time of the year. i hug him too, without any doubt. without questioning how the hell it happened so fast.
few months before, he was  just my best friend. just a good friend.
time after time, we had spent our time together.

i noticed few strand of his hair wont go the way it should be. i noticed how he won't get rid of it. actually it doesnt matter for me, but yeah sometimes its quite annoying. he had this broad chest, its enough to bury my head onto it. thats a part of him that i love the most. he would argue everything that doesnt fit to his perspective. his tiny eyes lit up every time we smile to each other. he would tease me whenever i frown. and i notice too that i will never get upset to him for such a long time. its hard for me to stay silent in front of him, because he would find a way to make me talk.

everything that makes him become him never failed to make me amazed.

he would ask me if i'm happy because of him.
and he should stop asking, because the answer is always the same.
i am happy because of him.
and i'm happy if he's happy too.

January 7, 2017

a blessing

I dont know how last year going to end
if I wasn't with you.

Things would fall apart
Things wouldn't be this good

You are the best thing that ever happened to me.

I am so much lucky to have you by my side. Like literally.
I have someone to hold onto
and I've never been this grateful in my entire life

I was hopeless, I was running out of chance
I lost myself
But I know I have you. I know you wouldn't let things fall apart
You wouldn't see my whole world collides.
That's what makes me realize that
You are a blessing.
Having you is such a privilege.